IDE AKHIR TAHUN

Akhir tahun 2013, saya mengajukan ide untuk natal pada sebuah fakultas psikologi di universitas nommensen, medan. Ide ini adalah turunan dari tema natal yang ada pada saat itu. Saya memakai meminta kerjasama mahasiswa, membeli peralatan sendiri (memang sudah niat beli untuk diri sendiri), dan merekam beberapa skenario. Berikut hasil editing versi saya. (versi yang ditayangkan di perayaan natal, dibuat oleh salah satu mahasiswa)

Credit title untuk video ini adalah
Producer : Hotpascaman
Director  : Rinesha
Co-Director : Josephine
Direcor of photography and cameraman : Monalisa

Talent : Dekan, Wakil dekan 3, Staff, perwakilan mahasiswa

Dan berikut ini adalah sedikit cuplikan behind the scene

Ego depletion and Procastination

is "a state when human possess less energy to move on as well as he/she want to continue to commit the normative."
         This is not the practition says but the defenition itself were redefine by me. I found this when i'm in attending the "seminar hasil penelitian" or in english says "Seminary of Result or wteva they called it. So here i am see that two word were accidentally rationaliting my very own lately behavior.
    It's already a month. where i already pass my 1st degree on magister profession in UGM becoming psycholog, and now when it came to continuying the magister one.. i feel less energy to move on, in other side my heart burns to motivate itself. but my inner, my thought shows the opposite. oh GOSH.... not to mention i must face the bereauchracy that never fits my expectation to make clear "who is the lucky lecturer that can guide my thesis". A month of march doing nothing productively contribute to my thesis just want to finding another job, making money, blogging reading some articles n journal but all these thing were an act of procastination if mine... jeeesss how can i be so lazy aaa

This is the situation that make my rationality being in state of ego depletion. I must try to get rid of all these... come to me oh holy luck, holy great mind and act. I need to finish this magister this year. the year 2012.

MOVIE : NEGERI 5 MENARA - REVIEW from ME

Almost all indonesian were proud seeing the incoming NEGERI 5 MENARA film, they proud cause the novel were success inside and outside of the indonesia
so let me review it from my amateur, otodidac cinematography (hei.. cine..whaaaaat??  well actually this is free right to blog, am i right - hihihi)

Story of Negeri 5 menara
starts with alif who were pointed to continue school at religion islamic school that called "pesantren" , his life dream were changing, his friendship too developing him to be a work hard people as in this film there are one statement in arabic "man jadda wa jada" (sorry if i wrote it with faulty), which mean "hard work determine success" or "keep struggle till end".

and this is my own review,
let's say all the badway

1. st fault (friends of alif makes an eye gaze to contact the director in scene after the drink milk) - it might be the actor were a newbie
2. nd fault the read of letter from alif's friend (the backsound of letter say "....kondisi sekarang ini" while the letter it self written just "kondisi ini" there are extra word.
3. rd.. The very clear mistaken when alif hv a jounalis time asking the kyai.. The questions list in the book that alif hands on were exactly a blank note. (i see it clearly on movies) well that's dissapointment for me
4. th fault is the ending scenario were actually a lil bit strange, it's just like there are jumping scenario, from little actor to be an adult actor... kinda dissapointment for me to.

let's say the bestway

1. the setting clearly was the true story telling in the novel
2. the supporting actor (friends of alif) performing good act
3. the simple story itself to define success , struggle and hard working

well i don't have the right to score this film, but if i have to make a scale , i will give 3.5 from 5 scale :)

it's true worlds are simplified and so the COMPANY LOGO

I want to write this for a long time ago.. yes it's matter of "S" word the SIMPLIFIED
i dont want to explain with detail. i take example for a big company logo in indonesia where i lived. Let's see
this is early  Telkom company logo

But for this day (2012 this blog written)


The next logo is the Public Train Company (PT KERETA API) this is the early logo

 

But for now, the logo become more simple, at single brush to the right with an arrow in it

 

The next one is dramatically changing the indonesian OIL n GAS Company, (PERTAMINA), the early logo was :

But  for now the logo significantly change

The last were the indonesian port corporation (IPC-PT PELABUHAN INDONESIA)

The new logo were below 

Those are the major change of big Company in Indonesia

thanx 4 the prayer

20 feb 2012 is my final third semster on magister proffession degree, well it's a profession test ofcourse. kinda cenat cenut like one of indonesian boy band said, but hei this ist i pass it with the some of revision, Thanks for the prayer, thankx for my beloving mother who always support me emotionally, and my father n brother econimically haha :D i'll try to proceed to next level is the fourth and ultimate semester to get the title of "Master" FIGHTIIIIING

SIRI OR SIRI

At first look at This video

 then next to this video

 R U SURE WANT TO BUY THIS PHONE????
 JUSSSSY JOKEEEE

the presents on my 25th brthday

the presents on my 25th brthday

24 november is my own birthday, 1986 as my birthyear, and i have my own story on my silvery day... yes it happens on 2011, where i have many outstanding surprise which i totally broke it... hahahaha

1st one is, my housemate when i was had an internship at GMF aerosia... yes it was very odd seeing my friend have a constantly obvious plan in surpring me. there are only three of us, the other one of my friend gone to jogja. so here it is the unsuccessfull surprise, when i was already done bathing, my friend from lower floor shouting that she had a problem with the flush water, and when one of them try to reach me up in the upper floor, i'm texting a sentence which contain" i do know the two work of your suprising job, thankyou", and then one of my friend who read it have an accident prone which is her leg "kissing the bed". yes her name is arnis.. n dima was there to look up what happened, and then i came to lower floor, seeing what happened and then here it goes the unsurprising surprise.
And this is the video.



the present video from the three (arnis, mba riri and dima), a wath that i needed...

video jam tangan



and what happened from my friend jogja, they are sending a presnt that i forgot to take the presents from tangerang post office, and the almost make them (fani, yandri, putri, dida and evi) mad coz i can't had a time to take it.. hehehee
ad here is the video while i was taking the present that sent from 20 november 2011, failed to deliverd to me and i take the present back from jogja (26 january 2012) so sorry yaaaaaaa hehehhe
here is the video breaking up the present's cover

video tearing the presents

INGIN MENYERAH

RASANYA INGIN MENYERAH SAJA

Satu bulan ini banyak menggerutu, banyak bersungut -sungut dan yang paling parah banyak penyesalan
Komitmen untuk diri sendiri agar tepat waktu, prioritas masalah kuliah sudah bukan lagi komitmen.
aku marah pada lingkungan yang tidak mendukung. tapi aku tidak ada hak untuk menghukum.
aku marah ketika kejadian yang sama berulang-ulang dan berulang. dan aku tidak berhak menghukumnya.

Aku merasa diri ini dipaksa flexibel. sudah kulakukan sesuai tuntutan lingkungan dan sudah mengorbankan integritasku, sudah menghancurkan komitmenku.
tapi yangkudapat adalah penyesalan terus dan menerus
yah saat ini pun aku menggerutu, dengan pertanyaan "kenapa lingkungan ini tidak berubah???" aku sudah mencoba menyesuaikan diri. tapi kenapa?
lingkungan selalu mempertanyakan kondisi yang dihadapi. aku sudah mengutarakan apa yang menjadi permaslahan. tapi mengapa yaaaah mengapa lingkungan belum mau menyadari.
dan meskipun mau menyadari, apakah ada etiket baik untuk mengakui??
sekali-kali tidak!!!!

aku ingin berspekulasi, ingin rasanya berspekulasi dalam persepsi diri sendiri, mungkinkah karena kebaikan saat aku sakit?? bukankah kebaikan adalah sesuatu yang tidak
mengharapkan imbalan?? yah seharusnya begitu, tapi aku melihat perilaku yang berbeda, seakan lingkungan menuntut, menyingung-nyingung betapa kebaikan saat aku sakit seakan-akan seperti penentu kehidupan
belum lagi kebaikan saat aku berulangtahun, selalu saja disinggung. aku heran ya Tuhan aku heran, karena selama ini aku berusaha tidak menghitung kebaikan yang mungkin aku lakukan pada lingkungan.
Aku heran yaaa Tuhan aku heran. aku selalu terdiam di kondisi seperti ini. Bukankah cukup bila aku mengorbankan komitmenku demi lingkungan?? komitmen dan integritas yang bagian dari konsep diriku, yang membuat aku jadi GOYAH

yah aku menggerutu, yah aku mau marah


aku sudah berusaha tidak egois. bahkan dari dulu sampai sekarang doa saat ulang tahunku prioritasnya adalah kelulusan dari tiap angkatanku dalam waktuMU.
aku sudah berusaha tidak egois.

aku marah.. yah aku marah...aku mengharapkan pengakuan ada yang salah dengan lingkungan, sekali lagi aku tidak ada hak untuk menghakimi.
aku marah .. yah aku marah..kecewa berat, bahkan lebih kecewa dari lingkungan yang mengannggap aku mengecewakan mereka.
AKU MARAH YAH.. AKU MENYESAL AKU SUDAH MENGORBANKAN INTEGRITASKU. MENGORBANKAN KOMITMENKU. MENGORBANKAN SIAPA AKU SEBENARNYA.

AKU MARAH KARENA DAMPAK PENGORBANAN INI BUKAN LINGKUNGAN YANG MERASAKANNYA TAPI BAGI AKU, ORANGTUAKU, DAN TANGGUNGJAWABKU PADA TUHAN.
AKU MARAH YAH TUHAN AKU MARAH... SANGAT MARAH...MENURUTKU INI SUDAH KETERLALUAN DALAM KEMANUSIAANKU. AKU MARAH DAN SANGAT MENYESAL TUHAN.

AKU INGIN MENYERAH SAJA .

cuek itu perlu (avoiding is needs)

CUEK ITU PERLU (AVOIDING WERE JUST A NEEDS)
It's a story between man and woman perceptions (damn i luv the manipulation of perception)..
It's happening in the office, while we wan to finishing the desk to go home, A charming, handsome man, came up to doing something with one of the person, then my friends which is happening to be a girl... They look at him, and the man stare for a while making a very slight smile to perform his charm, walk like knight that already came from a greatest war, chopping the breast and bla..bla.. Bla performing that he was seen by my friends girls..
There it goes, my friends start making a micro expressions, the two of them looking for each other make some rolling eyes emotion and an inhaling signing they make some "sighh". And the man go out, we too going out for home , hahaha
at the spot that we always wait the cab, i hard some kind of blubblering bla..bla..bla edition which content was, mocking the man who was we recently met before office hours we ended..."oh my god i said, can u just please ended, let him be like that"
N then one of my friend said "it can't be like that dear, u must knew it was very annoying to see that man doing thing like that"
My others friens said to complete " we do know that he is charm, handsome etc, but hey u dont need to be overwhelmed pleased, it was just he was the only person that have a good looking in this world"
Than i say (while entering the cab) "but he is handsome right, are there any problems he showed a litte bit?"
"that's the problem" my friends argued back
"we do know he is handsome but hey, he dont need to make a nonverbal expression like that, eeewww"
N then i sad " well it's all up to you to perceived it unfortunately it might not that be real"
Bla..bla.blaa... Till home after a few minutes, my friend start a talking which is lead to the same story again
"oh come on" i said, "can u just let it, avoid it??, is there anything that he done making the both of you feels in big miserable??"

"no, but!!! I just dont feel it best for him showing up like that"

i said again
"it's his right to perform the way that he want to be"

My friends cut
"but it's our right to say something about him, wording him, analysing him"

I said sharply
"hei u dont have a right to evaluate people like that, once again i said u dont have it"
I continued
"hei, i do showing like u two argumenting others but this is too far to have an argument, for me i just say keep on my mind a slight tought, n it's end there."

My friends said
"well it might be the different between girls n boys, we talk about everysingle thing again n again, but boys dont"

I point my thought
" but hey, theres a few single thing that u musnt stay focused, the unimportant thing that didnt make u fell behind, sometimes u just need to avoid like that, let them be what they wanna be, please dont waste ur energy"

Well in this humanity world, there always perceptions i do prefer stay focusing what i will face straight forward.

untitle success

Sebuah pencapaian atau sebuah proses merupakan dua hal yang berbeda namun selalu yang menjadi pusat perhatian sebuah kesuksesan. Banyak yang bilang pencapaian kesuksesan dari terukurnya semua barang, jumlah nilai uang yang menjadi hak dari pemilik. Dan tidak sedikit yang memiliki pengertian untuk mengukur kesuksesan adalah terukurnya jumlah pengalaman yang berisi penanganan masalah
penangan problema dalam kehidupan, pengalaman kerja, dan pengalaman persahabatan, jumlah variasi pengalaman ini menjadi pertanda banyaknya situasi. Yang menjadi banyaknya alternatif solusi yang mampu diberikan oleh orang yang memiliki paham pencapaian sukses dari variasi proses pengalaman.
sebenarnya tidak ada satupun didunia ini yang benar-benar baku, tidak ada satupun yang benar-benar telah tertulis sejak dunia diciptakan.
(not to mention the religiusity of yours, mine, and others).

"kamu mau sukses kamu harus perhatikan apa yang kamu punya"
"kamu mau sukses harus menikmati prosesnya, cari sebanyamungkinm pengalaman"

hei hei hei... shut all the bullsh*t procedure of ur very norm life, DONT BE!!!

u are very unique to define ur own success

ikutan ngeblog ttg PUASA

puasa..yaaah.. puasa..bulan ini adalah bulan dimana umat muslim melakukan puasa, satu artikel yang saya baca adalah puasa menahan 3 hal, makan minum dan nafsu duniawi. mari kembali ke defenisi yang dimaksud puasa, secara religi saya sangat amat sepaham, meskipun saya bukan orang yang memiliki religi yang sama dengan penganut yang melaksanakan puasa pada bulan ramadhan ini, (pasti ada tapinya... ya benar ) TAPI, banyak persepsi yang berbeda dan telah dirasakan menjadi budaya saat melakukan puasa, well, kinda routinity unto habbit one month in a year.
Hey yo.. what's the matter, mari saya contohkan dengan pengalaman yang telah saya alami maupun saya pelajari dari orang lain,
"puasa...puasa.... ga makan dan minum, tapi nanti buka pakai apa ya..?"
"pasti enak kali ya pake es cendol, kelapa...grrr yang seger..seger..."
"makan yok dimana gitu"
"mau makan umm... spagethu, fetucini, gorengan"
"yuk ntar beli ya..."



"di list aja yan mau dibeli"
"yuuk.. mareee"

sepintas percakapan diatas menunjukkan inti puasa adalah ketika ingin berbuka dengan menikmati makanan yang berlebih (tidak seperti biasa di hari-hari biasa--- ya iyalah kapan lagi gitu loh), hmmm... jadi ini sepintas hanya kebiasaaam untuk makan lebih dari biasanya..yaaaah..saya bingung...bingungnya adalah, heeei....apakah kamu benar berpuasa atau terbiasa puasa?

mari dengar iklan televisi indonesia
"##sensor### cocok untuk berbuka"
"kesegaran ####### untuk sahur dan berbuka"
"berbukalah dengan yang manis teh botol #$#%$#@"


nah lo....karena terbiasa berpuasa satubulan dalam setahun, para pengusaha melakukan pesan-pesan yang berbau marketing.. produk ini cocok untuk ini, itu..buka, sahur, menahan puasa, bau mulut.bla..bla..bla....LIHAT BETAPA HEBATNYA MEREKA MEMANFAATKAN KONDISI INI KARENA TERBIASA DENGAN BUDAYA KONSUMSI BERLEBIH.

fiuuuh....menurut saya, memang benar fisik adalah dampak yang paling terasa dikarenakan adanya sekitar 12 jam tidak mendapat asupan berupa minuman dan makanan,akan tetapi sangat baik bila tidak berlebih , dan sangat benar bila bisa melakukan dengan berpedoman pada keyakinan religi yang sebnar-benarnya.

THRUST?SUSPICIOUS?

Hei ho... Long time not writing on my blog... Oh well this would be coz of my hectic time on june-july.... Where will I start?!
*sigh* kinda turtle's moving i am,,, (what!!! Is this somekind of languages!!! :p )

Let's skip the hectic one, jump to the topic
Here I am in the one of mall in west jakarta, they named it SMS... No.. This is not Short Message Services, but this is Sumarecon mall Serpong.
After a hard time we pass through all the way to find ou this place, at last we can eat... Mmm.... Nice meal... Well move on to the another scene, where I always sit down waiting the unbeat girls (in theory that I've heard when in one team which is majory by girls n it's leader were male the male always be beat up and so on the opposite of it - well that's true), I'm quitely sit next to the child which is playing somekind of nintendo game, when I see the parent (father of the child actually) sit next to the child, this child's father's hand, rounding up his hand to her child, and see me with the super evil eyes, just like looking up the demon who want to do somekind of the sexual harrassment (well this problem theme, were being populirized in this country)... A shocking non verbal ... Oh dear oh dear... I just sit here, I'm not doing anything, this is public area, which mean I'm having the problem with my appearence being falsely recognized as the pedofille ones... Hahahahaha
Looks like I had to change all the 1st impression to everysingle person that I met... Coz it's really2 indicator thrustworthy in this unthrustworthy too.

Anyway to earn money not ur ordinary way.

the 30th june 2011, the day was so great xperience to knew life of others.
they call them self "pedagang asongan" we heard sound...'oleh2-sale', 'lanting','nasi goreng','keripik','lemarebuan','seribuan','tigarebuan', everything they sell from appetizer,maincourse n others.
From all of ot, i do surprised by one person who use somekind of blanket or unuse "lap", cleaning liquid
N then cleaning the floor of train. he is not from the train serving cleaner but from outside, the village citizen who use to came up to train while the train hv a transit or break time.
Another surprising xperience is other person use a parfume kit to spray one side to side seat n after that, he ask for somekind of reward for spraying.
I see the hardwork's face, i see the tiring old lady, i do still seeing the tic's person selling somekind of meal stuff. What a day experience seeing how they try to survive, it's alert me to stay in humidity, stay in humanity low profile face.
Seeing all these remind me to the sentence written in one's sponsor's romp that use by villager 'Caro nafka ga kenal capek ' in english it might be translate as "Hardwork life Surviving never knowing tiring"

what a day in may

23 may
Just a luvly way to re-all stuff
though i'm not too fond coz it wasn't go along with my plan...
Well.. In way of what?!
Let me give ya all of this day's stories..
It's a bit lazy i am to start over but this is a very bright new way so..
(STAAARRRT IT PLEASEEE...) hahaa..
06:00 i do text all my fellas to in which surprising our "tante mesum" we call her hahaha..in english "the pornographic people" :D

Well firstly all of them were one word that is "yes" but, it was totally change while i have had take a bath , my friend change the way that it wasn't my idea.
Well not to mention it's abit differ the way i do suggest... it's good plan anyway...
Then, when i walk to campz, my wantedly friends are very disturbing coz she herself were not came at a pricesely time which we already had pointed...so there was i had my very own unplanned, arriving the doctoral public court at 11:30..while in that event... i do very surprised, shocked while the judges show their 'horn' (hey i thought it would be very great n full of fun,,, but a slip anger and a slip threat there), in my opinion - i do want to be one of the higher education level "doctor" but fortunately my bad!!! My intention were a lil blocked coz the all quwstions of the judges... Huuu,..
after that, there was i,, continue with the meal outside the room where the public doctoral court take place... I eat "tim solo", "sate", "fruit salad (a bit fatty salad i guess it has cheese while mayonese it self fat >.<) After that, we (include the wanted person meet n go to class where we make our celebration of birthday party), she was a lil bit shocked,,, thanx God she is happy. After all the euphoria of all b'day party, i proceed with my schedule to learn driving car... Badly the timing so bad, so it was cancelled.. But the good time not least, my friend inviting me to eat the yogya style in dinner they call it "angkringan" though the meal itself the daily menu that we've seen.. Like "nasi goreng" oh dear... So socialize, so calming (but the weather was cold coz it's 7-9 night life),, the we proceed to sunday's habit day of one media group company, the "jazz mben senen"... I do admit this is my first jazz show attendance,, so there was i feel calm.. I'll show the opening act by the video later on... Well that's it for now i'll stop my autism n socialize in this jazzy night :D

Untukmu manusia

kamu itu manusia kan??
Kamu itu manusia! Ya manusia
coba lihat pemikiranmu, perlakuanmu
Aku mau memperlihatkan kebodohanmu, kecerobohanmu

Apa yg tlah kau lakukan pada bumimu? Pada sesamamu? Dan bahkan dirimu?

Lihat !!!
kau bilang mau kebersihan tapi kau melakukan penumpukan sampah pada tidak tempatnya...
Kau rusak bumimu, kau rusak sesamamu dan kau rusak dirimu dengan menjadi egois

Kau tentukan siapa yang layak berada di dunia ini, kau lakukan perang kau lakukan terorisme, kau membunuh !!!
Kau rusak bumi tempat yg kau pikir layak ditinggali dengan nuklirmu,bom mu, dan senjatamu...kau rusak sesamamu, kau tentukan org dengan menghilangkan nyawa mereka, apa hakmu??? Bukankah kau terlahir atas kehendak dari yg kau yakini?? Dan kenapa kau menentukan seenaknya setelah kau mendapatkan pemikiran yg sempit itu untuk eksekusi sesamamu??
Kau rusak dirimu menjadi egois

Untukmu manusia
SIAPAKAH ENGKAU, MANUSIA YG LAYAK MENENTUKAN KEHIDUPAN BUMI INI?
SIAPAKAH ENGKAU MANUSIA YANG MENENTUKAN HAK ORANG LAIN DAN BAHKAN HAK HIDUPNYA?

SEBAB BARANGSIAPA YANG IRIHATI, DAN MEMENTINGKAN DIRI SENDIRI DISITULAH SEMUA NIAT JAHAT